Care Transmissions
Care Transmissions offers a series of scores attending to ideas of felt absence and care with and for another. Written from the coastal North East of lutruwita/Tasmania, there is an unreal and guilty sense of safety from this pristine intact place, knowing at this time, what's just across the water.
Falling/failing/cracking
Caught between movement and arrest
Freefall
Sharpen the senses. We are one part of a whole.
Of mindful remembering, energetic fields.
Of slow breathing landscapes and deep earth memory.
Arriving inconspicuously, the confluence of thoughts resurface, a new drawing of an old moment – out on the black oily liquid edge.
A turbulence in the heart.
Submit to this weakness, not forward or back. You are held in quiet distraction. Meeting one’s self—a hand, a heaviness, a shadow in absence and uncertainty.
A knowable sensation. An inescapable future.
Walk
Consider the pad of the foot
The softness of flesh
Weight meeting saturated moss
Shifting dunes
Undercuts, drop aways
Abandoned pools waiting for the oncoming tide
Out of touch. With no touch. Attending, inexorably closer.
Do you have the courage to care?
Ask yourself, what are the prevailing conditions? The perforations of missing? That noisy emptiness. A hole, puncturing hope.
A pulse
An impulse
A desire
A soft sigh
Exhalation
A possibility
Between breath, suspended in a moment of presence, breathe with the other.
We are joined through the lightest touch, water currents trailing across the surface of the skin. At times, anchored or tethered to each other. She is small in stature but her presence and grace palpable. Her skilled and listening hands encourage submission, to relinquish and unravel the inner liquid body, floating in embryonic state. We glide across and through the warm currents, she coaxes my framework to elongate beyond itself. Carried, expansive, held and nurtured – I slip into a mesmeric but acutely sensorial state.
How can the body resist this potent liquid space? This healing dance—
Hold this knowing you are held by another
Felt indescribable exhaustion
You are under no obligation
Wind your way towards this moment
Slow listening, slow body
Step into this dance
Be with your history
Pay full attention
Go below the surface. Lose the edge and contour. Enjoy small movement as seismic shifts.
A rift opens, leaking across and into other imaginings; fix on an unfolding seam.
Stay with this. Stay still, notice the shifts—moments that glint and glitter. A familiar sense of otherness. From this inner world is it possible to catch a hint of our ‘ghost particles’? The matter that democratises and joins us all, human with more-than—.
A slippage, a rupture
Under/mining, loose ground
Collapse is inevitable
Disconnect to instruction, obey intuition, for every and no reason.
What is this work?
Why is it so hard to soften against ourselves?
What happens when care is not enough?
Obedience fatigue
Small pinnacle dreams toppled by rejection–doubt follows. Your history is exhausted. R words prevail, demand re-invention. Re-imagine and find resilience. Realistic isn’t in the vocabulary. Being real isn’t about trying.
Rest when you are tired, be non-judgemental in abandoning, embrace a lower bar, discard obsolete practices, remove the guilt, not doing, turn away from competitiveness, ask questions of rigour, intention and inquiry.
Can you stop heartache?
You are held captive by this moment.
Image: Leigh Hobba, 2020, River (development).